You have been called into the bosses office for a “chat”.  And it isn’t good.

Knowing how to handle criticism is a skill.  How do you handle it?

Do you:
React, challenge,blame, justify, deny, accuse, hide, freeze?

Do you:
Ask for clarity, step up to the plate, brainstorm solutions, and take responsibility?

If you know that your tendency is to do the first set of actions, then I congratulate you. Being aware that you don’t handle negative feedback very well is a critical first step to mastering what really is just a fear response.

Fear responses can be identified as your knee jerk reaction to certain situations. It is that tendency that you rely on to protect you when something feels too big to handle. Yes, fear responses may actually be running your life more than YOU are.

This is where I can offer you some very valuable assistance in breaking the habitual patterns that keep you feeling stuck and unfulfilled. Working with me as your personal Life Coach creates the opportunity to really investigate what your knee jerk reactions are, so that you can identify new ways of being. In other words, think about how it is that you really want to be when you are with someone challenging to you. What qualities do you wish you could pull out and bring to the table with you?  When we get down to the work of defining those qualities, that are personal and unique to you, you WILL start to make real and lasting changes in your life.

Here are some questions to get you started the next time someone comes to you with “feedback”….

Ask:
Am I making this personal when it really isn’t?

What would being “right” about this give me?

What, from all the feedback I received, am I willing to own. What am I willing to let go of?

What do I need now?

Questions such as these help you move through the situation. The next time you find yourself stuck, remember to work on finding the perspective that you need to get you moving again. The more skilled you become at this, the less chance you have of getting seriously stuck in the rut that leaves you unhappy and erodes your confidence. Choose to do the work every day – no matter what criticism comes your way.

I am thrilled by the opportunity to present at the upcoming momcafe event in Kelowna on October 28, 2011. Imagine a room full of moms all interested in becoming more of whomever it is they want to be. Those are my kind of people!

My session is called “Hey Hot Mama”, which is all about how to bring the hottie to your exhausted, overworked and sometimes overwhelmed, life as a mother.  I am going to talk about the importance of connecting to your inner hottie, and provide five 5 strategies to help you make it happen.

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I am currently facilitating a leadership program offered by the Women’s Enterprise Centre called Taking the Stage®.

This fantastic program for women in business was developed by a Toronto-based company, The Humphrey Group and was previously only available to women in large corporations. Thanks to their generous support, special project funding from Status of Women Canada, the Women’s Enterprise Centre was able to offer this program to entrepreneurs and women in smaller corporations.

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“By all these lovely tokens
September days are here,
With summer’s best of weather
And autumn’s best of cheer.”
-   Helen Hunt Jackson, September, 1830-1885

September feels like the end, but in other ways it is just the beginning.  September has a new year kind of feel.  Who amongst us has not thought at some time this summer….”in September I will start_______.”  That is probably why so many of us groan and sigh that September is upon us.  It means it is time to get our butts back in gear.  We set ourselves up with big expectations that we are going to do this, start that, and accomplish all that we did not during the lazy days of summer.

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Feeling Stuck? Use this word, and change your life.

On that historic day, November 4, 2008, we witnessed President-elect Obama, give one of the greatest leadership speeches of our lifetime.  In that speech, we heard about the power of YES. “Yes we can”.  Obama tells us that yes we can “have a world of opportunity and possibility” and that, “there has never been anything false about hope.”  In order for us to capitalize on hope, there must be action. Saying Yes is one way of creating more action.  As a life coach, I encourage people to take action by uncovering the fears that keep them stuck and unable to move forward…and say yes.  If you want to discover what it is that is holding you back, start with this simple exercise. 

For the next week, pay attention to the times you say Yes in your daily life.  Are you saying Yes more than you are saying No?  In what areas of your life are you saying Yes more often? Is saying Yes easy for you, or are you the type who really needs to think for awhile before committing?  Conversely, maybe you will discover that Yes comes freely, often flying out of your mouth, only to regret it much later.  Read more