Archive for Motivation

15 May 2013

Change is a Process, Not an Event

No Comments Be More, Decision Making, Empowerment, Fearless Living, Life Coaching, Live your best Life, Motivation

changeA classic trap of fear is to innately believe that you are fundamentally flawed and won’t ever get “there.” There are things we long for like, “to be comfortable in my own skin” or “that I will like myself” or that “I won’t be lonely anymore.” Thoughts like this damage your ability to continue on your path with the conviction that is required to actually make changes in your life.

Drop the lie that you can ever really “arrive.” Anything worth having in life requires conviction, work, and then maintenance. When you embrace that life is a process you are  then better able to help yourself shift to the mindset of adjusting and carrying on when things get tough. When you drop the belief that you are innately flawed you are allowed to take responsibility for yourself. There isn’t some big hidden mystery of why you are so screwed up! You are believing a fear based lie that keeps you stuck. Stop the trigger that leads to erosion of your sense of worth that is vital to make the lasting changes that you seek. Embrace the process, I guarantee you that you will like the results.

14 Mar 2013

Plant your Seeds this Spring

1 Comment Do More, Motivation, Spring

Spring To DoHopefully by now signs of spring are beginning to emerge wherever you are. The time change heralds longer days and naturally our focus turns to what lie ahead… summer in all it’s glory.

Since the move of the time change to earlier in March thoughts of spring really do come quicker every year. We feel like we better start to get at it when we still have daylight at 6PM. The additional day light at the end of the day makes up for the getting up earlier adjustment. Spring is coming, Spring is coming!

Spring is the set up for your whole year.  What do you want to be ready for by the time summer hits?  Make no mistake about it, spring is the time of year where there is work to be done.  Whether it is taxes, closets, the car or the garden, spring time often means a season of work, and if you can do it right, it will be your most productive time of the year. Don’t object, or reject the hard work of these next couple months, because Spring is where your efforts have the most impact.  Here is why:

1.  Just like a garden, the seeds that you plant in the spring require a lot less maintenance once the hard work of planting is done.  If you need to clean your garage, sort through your closet or do paper work, think of it the same way.  If you decide you are going to embrace the spring and get at it, the results will last all year.  Think about what you will be able to do once that task is done rather than focusing on the overwhelming details in front of you.

2.  When one of the things on your list gets done, it gives way for new things to come up.  Everyone can relate to having that niggly thing that we really want to take care of, but it just keeps hanging around.  Decide to get that thing done this spring.  When you complete that nagging task, you create freedom. It’s off your mind and quite literally has stopped weighing you down.

3.  Clutter, weeds, taxes, overflowing dresser drawers, and the “room we throw all our crap in” literally pulls like a weight on our subconscious.  It gets overwhelming, and that is what stops us from taking action.  Use spring as the catapult to get you moving again.  After a long winter, people are naturally inclined to want to get outside and shake off some of the cobwebs.  Use this  unstoppable force to help you tackle those overwhelming items… once you start the overwhelm lifts.

4.  Think about the results you want.  Since the beginning of the year I have been urging you to think about how you want to feel by the time Christmas rolls around again (yep, I said it!) ~ Ready for a Fabulous February.  What results do you want for yourself by the end of the year?  The time is now.  If you really want to have those feelings, the time is now.  Plant the seeds of your intentions with concerted effort this spring, and the harvest will be yours to enjoy.

Coach Yourself~
Remember what your year intention was back in January.  I hope that you wrote it down.  What 3 things do you need to get at in order to keep the intention in motion?  Do you need to join a group, make a phone call, or ask for help? Write those three things down. Push yourself to take action. Spring is the time!

Related article: Keep Yourself Going This Spring Using Kindness

30 Aug 2012

Don’t cry because it is over, smile because it happened ~ Dr. Seuss.

1 Comment Goal Setting, Live your best Life, Motivation

Wow. Summer. I love summer, and I had such a good summer this year. I am very proud of myself, because that is exactly what I set out to do this year, enjoy every last bit of summer. {Be on Purpose this Summer ~ Tips to make summer last longer.}

And it is not over! I am determined to suck ever ounce of sunshine goodness, but there is no denying that the bounty of autumn is ready to be picked. Apples are nearly ready and school is upon us. September days are here again.

What are your September goals?  Have you gotten clear about what you want to accomplish by Christmas? Have you checked in with your New Year’s intention? Have you given yourself credit for the good you have created so for in 2012?

Fall is the time for harvest and when we prepare for the upcoming winter. We usually embark on the autumn months with a renewed sense of getting at “it”. Much like the New Year, September brings a new set of ambitions to complete before the snow flies. Learn my top six tips for keeping up with your autumn to do list. Forget about motivation and find out what it really takes to become an unstoppable you. Join me on September 5 at 6PM PST.

Even though I feel like moaning because summer of 2012 is flashing by, I am taking the time to be grateful and practice mindfulness of what I do want. I am smiling because it happened. What about you?

12 Apr 2012

Keep yourself going this Spring using Kindness

1 Comment Goal Setting, Motivation, Spring

KindnessYou may have noticed that we are already 4 months into the “New Year” and since a new season is upon us, I thought it would be timely to ask you to check back in on what your real new years resolutions have been?  At the beginning of the year, I urged you to “Ease your way into the New Year”.  Now as we enter into Spring (so naturally filled with anticipation and the hope of sunny days to come) I thought it would be to good to give you a reminder of how to re-energize your spring.  Kindness can become your ultimate motivating tool.  Many people are mistaken in believing that in order to motivate, stay on track or get things done they need strict discipline and all the hard line approaches that we associate with that.

When I think of kindness I urge myself to think of true kindness.  The caring, comforting, nurturing kindness we would treat a brand new baby with.  The type of kindness that uses intuitive hunches and works at looking at what the real underlying needs are.  Identifying the need and serving it.  That is what we do with newborns.  Can we apply that to ourselves?

Absolutely!  And we can use your goals list that you have been working with since January to get the momentum going again.

Think about your goals. Pick the top three that you really really really want to take care of.  Ask yourself, if I could reasonably do this in 60 days, would I feel really good?

For example, here are three typical goals:

  • Loose 25 lbs
  • Keep a clean house
  • Go to the gym

First of all, did you pick something that you can reasonably do in the next 60 days?  Immediately that changes the first one from 25 lbs to 8lbs.  Keep a clean house works if you are already super tidy and clean.  If that is something that you struggle with, then you need to define that goal further.  Ask, I would be really happy if I could….  Have the laundry done by Sunday night or keep the kitchen counters dish free and clean, or the floor swept every night after dinner. Watch out for sweeping declarations like “Keep a Clean House”.  How will you know when you have done enough? Will it ever be enough?  Same with “Go to the gym”, how many times do you want to go to the gym?  What days?  2 days? 7 days?  Define what “Go to the Gym” means.  So here is the more appropriate goal list.

  • Loose 8 lbs in the next 60 days.
  • Keep the kitchen counters clean and clear, sweep the floor every night after dinner, laundry picked up and in hamper & done by Sunday night
  • Go to gym 3 days a week for the next 4 weeks.

Now with respect to each of those things, ask yourself:

What would I have if I achieved this goal?

If I had that, how would I feel?

If I was feeling that way, what would I do?

If you are unable to really connect to the feeling that comes up from asking those questions, I dare say you are ill prepared to realize those goals.  That is the trap of unkind goal setting. Being unable to connect or feel what it is that you really want is a set up so that you continue to use punitive methods of self motivating.

Here is an example of how someone might talk their way through these goals using kindness as their operating system:

Loose 8 Pounds.  If I lost 8lbs I would have a feeling of satisfaction.  If I had that I would feel better about myself.  If I felt better about myself I would have more energy to loose even more weight.

Keep a clean house.  If I had a clean house I would feel more calm and sorted out.  If I had that, I would have more clarity.  If I was more clear I could accomplish more, and I would feel more at peace.

Go to the gym.  If I went to the gym 2 times this week I would feel like I accomplished something.  If I accomplished that, I would be over the hump and back in the gym.  I want to just keep getting myself back into the gym.  If I did that, I could be satisfied that I was making an effort.

If you look at the common themes of all of these answers, you can see that the feelings that are coming up are things like, satisfied, calm, clear, accomplished.  Those words evoke feelings.  When kindness is our operating system we can connect to what we really want to feel which become the basis for our intentions.

Thoughts are the basis of feelings. Feelings are really the foundation of our intentions.  If you work on kindly managing your thoughts, how you feel will naturally follow.  Where we naturally follow actually become our true intentions.

If you really want to continue creating your best year yet, I urge you to pay attention to your thoughts, your feelings and what your true intentional living pattern is.  When you are aware, you can notice when you shift off course into negative thoughts and feelings.  Choose then to kindly nudge yourself back to what you really want. Remind yourself: “what I really want is to feel satisfied, calm, clear and accomplished”, if I don’t go to the gym tonight, I won’t get to feel that.  I am going to be kind, and go get those good things for me.  I am going to the gym!

Kindness truly brings about the power to make our intentions real.